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Gee, just a week or so ago, Hillary Clinton was pondering becoming a preacher and talking about what a devout Christian she is. Yeah… because all Christians believe in voodoo. Right. She speaks in her new boring book about her overwhelming frustration with her email scandal and how she was “tempted” to construct voodoo dolls in the images of “certain members” of the news media and Congress, and then “stick them full of pins.” Nice. What’s next? Child sacrifice? Maybe a golden calf or a midnight orgy. Damn… wish that hadn’t crossed my mind. Now I need to bleach it again.

In Clinton’s newly released book, “What Happened,” she bitterly complains about the attacks against her use of her private email server. She insists they “were untrue or wildly overstated, and motivated by partisan politics.” Uh no… they weren’t and she still hasn’t been held to account for them, but people are working on that.

Clinton blames former FBI Director James Comey for her loss of the election in her book (along with a whole list of others), but relies on his 2016 testimony before Congress to try and justify her use of an unauthorized email server. She cites Comey’s statement that she only set it up as a matter of convenience in another attempt to explain the server away. “Given my inability to explain this mess, I decided to let other voices tell the story this time. I hope that it helps to connect the dots and explain what did and equally important, didn’t happen,” Clinton notes, adding that releasing her frustration is “good for her mental health.” Evidently, so is voodoo.


In her book, Hillary confesses her voodoo doll temptation: “It was a dumb mistake. But an even dumber “scandal.” It was like quicksand: the more you struggle, the deeper you sink. At times, I thought I must be going crazy. Other times, I was sure it was the world that had gone nuts. Sometimes I snapped at my staff. I was tempted to make voodoo dolls of certain members of the press and Congress and stick them full of pins. Mostly, I was furious at myself.” Now, some might brush that off as hyperbole, but I don’t think it is. Not in Clinton’s case.

This is not the first time that Clinton has spoken about the dark practice of voodoo. In her previous memoir, Hard Choices, Clinton described attending a voodoo spirit ceremony with a “voodoo priest” during her honeymoon with Bill Clinton in Haiti in 1975. Nothing to worry about there… nothing at all if you are into voodoo that is. In her book Hard Choices, she speaks about the encounter:

One of the most memorable experiences of our trip was meeting a local voodoo priest named Max Beauvoir.

He invited us to attend one of his ceremonies. We saw Haitians “seized with spirits” walk on hot coals, bite the heads off live chickens, and chew glass, spit out the shards, and not bleed. At the end of the ceremony, the people claimed the dark spirits had departed.

Yeah, don’t we all visit a voodoo priest on our honeymoon? I mean, who doesn’t? Did I tell you how thrilled I am this witch wasn’t elected? But I’m sure she’s practicing her voodoo for Trump as I write this. Maybe someone ought to check into that as well. Just sayin’.

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